By Jennifer Pass

Special to the Record

The last lines of this song by Gilbert O鈥橲ullivan are 鈥淎nd when she passed away I cried and cried all day Alone again, naturally Alone again, naturally.鈥�

We are born into families, and extended families and attend schools, community centres and churches where we make friends. As adults we often have friends from our workplace. We may play sports and go to sporting events or play a musical instrument in a band or with friends. For many years of our lives, we are actively engaged with others and interested in their lives. Our significant other is often our best friend and we enjoy their company and socializing with them and others.

So what happens to seniors to make social isolation so common?

Retirement and illness and death of friends and family change the dynamic of our social lives.

Maybe we don鈥檛 visit an old friend because our hearing is bad. Maybe we don鈥檛 go out for dinner as we don鈥檛 feel comfortable driving at night. And very often, a senior loses their best friend and closest companion when their spouse dies. The grief that follows may involve a long period of being alone.

So, natural changes of aging tend to make us less connected with others. Through the social separation caused by the COVID pandemic, seniors suffered increased isolation. As elders, we are more vulnerable, and as such, we are less ready to jump back into socializing. And when a senior stops doing something for two to three years (be it badminton with a friend, or scrabble at the local community centre), it is so much harder to 鈥済et back on the horse.鈥�

But we do need to try!

鈥淲hat鈥檚 the big deal?鈥� you might say. 鈥淚鈥檓 OK just hanging out at home alone.鈥�

The National Seniors Council of Canada defines social isolation as a low quantity and quality of contact with others. There are serious health risks associated with this. The risks include increased chance of premature death, lower general well-being, depression, disability from chronic disease, poor mental health, increased use of health and support services, reduced quality of life, increased caregiver burden, and poor general health (https://helpagecanada.ca/resources/social-isolation-and-loneliness).

When we were younger, we took specific actions to stay healthy. And as seniors we need to encourage ourselves to do the same (and this is harder as the brain has to often fight the body to do much of anything). If you live alone and do not have anyone who visits and do not get out and visit others, consider calling Comox Valley Senior Support Society (250-871-5940) and inquiring about their friendly visitor program. If you are having difficulty preparing meals, Lush Valley (250-331-0152) has a program to help seniors learn to cook 鈥� and you just might make some friends there. And if you may feel that you are beset with medical problems, or with care of a significant other, there are support groups for caregivers, ostomates, those with cardiac problems, etc. You aren鈥檛 the only reluctant senior who needs to get back on the horse 鈥�- but you don鈥檛 have to be the last! And your body, mind and soul will thrive with the connectedness.

Jennifer Pass is the co-ordinator of Comox Valley Elders Take Action (ETA)